I am currently enrolled in the science of well-being class at Yale University with Dr. Laura Santos. I’ll finish the class in three weeks, and the class has been surprisingly helpful. What is most helpful about the class is that each week there is a very practical exercise aimed at increasing the student’s happiness. Unlike most college class I have been enrolled in I would not describe this class as academically rigorous. It doesn’t have a mountain of reading, difficult test, or a long paper due at the end of course. Instead there is a weekly lecture which explains what research has discovered about happiness. Each lecture explores how we naturally want things which we think will make us happy, but in the end, they are dead ends which don’t lead to the happiness that we want.
The lectures also uncover what Dr. Santos calls the “annoying features” of our minds that miss lead us. It is like looking at an optical illusion (like the one below) where the orange circle on the right looks bigger than the one on the left. The lectures show why the dots are really the same size and why the brain misinterprets the visual information. In the science of well-being we explore ideas of happiness rather than looking at dots. But the concept is the same, our brains mislead us and, in the class, we examine why our brains mislead us. It is fascinating.
This week’s lecture explored WOOP. Woop is a science-based mental strategy developed by Gabriele Oettigen, a German academic psychologist. The technique is easy to understand and is backed by 20 years of research which shows its effectiveness.
WOOP is an acronym which stands for WISH, OUTCOME, OBSTICLES, and PLAN. The idea is to think seriously about what you want, visualize the perfect outcome, visualize the obstacles which may keep the wish from becoming reality, and then make a plan to overcome the obstacles. Of course, it is possible that when thinking about the obstacles it becomes clear that that the wish is unrealistic and new wish must be developed. Dr. Oettigen suggest that this strategy can be used for a wish which can be accomplished in a day, a year or five years. And as you would expect there is a book and an app to help people “woop their life”.
I have no doubt that the technique works and that it has helped thousands of people get what they really want in life. I think that Dr. Oettigen has done excellent research and has been brilliant in her ability to explain so simply how anyone can get what they realistically want. I only wish I had wish I had thought of WOOP and you can be sure I will incorporate WOOP into my life coaching with Airmen.
It seems to me that the brilliance of WOOP is its simplicity. The idea of setting goals and making a plan to achieve goals is not new. The idea of visualization is thousands of years old. But combining visualization and goal setting with a four-letter acronym is not only revolutionary, it is really helpful.
I really hope you can all tell I am a big fan of the idea, the book (which I haven’t read yet but am 
sure I will love) and the app (which I have looked at and like a lot). As I said, my only frustration with WOOP is that I didn’t think of it.
However, like almost everything that it true, life is often more complicated than a four-letter acronym. It is complicated for several reasons. First, I think it is difficult to come up with one single wish. Most of us have a lot of wishes and it is hard to prioritize, and discard wish two and three for the sake of number one. We want it all! For example, I have a friend that was set to graduate from a very important school on December 23rd. The wish was easy, I wanted to be there to celebrate his graduation. It was also easy to visualize the outcome. We (Debbie and I had the same wish) would fly, hang out in a nice hotel and spend some time celebrating with our friend. The obstacles were also easy to identify. I would need to buy tickets and make sure all our Christmas Day arrangements were made before we left. We made a plan and were moving to fulfilment.
Then COVID got worse. The obstacles grew in size. It looked like we had to make a choice to either do Christmas with the Airmen or postpone the trip. It appeared that we had two wishes that were in conflict. It took us several days and conversations with each other and our friend before we made the decision, a very painful decision, to postpone the trip. I feel like it was the right decision, but it doesn’t feel good. I think most of us have competing wishes. And rather than focusing on one wish, we try and make all our wishes come true without thinking deeply or making hard choices.
It is possible that a daily wish, which is a fine thing, can be done quickly. I think this is a great way to start your day. Ask yourself what do you want? Then move on to visualize the outcome, the obstacles, and make a plan.
However, often our bigger wishes often take more time to consider. For larger wishes (for example: having a successful marriage, becoming an astronaut or discovering a cure for cancer) we need quiet time to carefully consider our wish. We need to include others who have gone before us to help us visualize the outcome, better understand the obstacles and make an effective plan. (I think this accurately describes my work as a life coach. My job as a life coach is to help others clearly articulate their wish, visualize the outcome, be realistic about the obstacles and make a plan).
I think sharing your deepest wish with someone else is a hard and requires a high level of vulnerability. It takes courage to share your deepest wish with someone else. I also think that when we don’t share our wishes with others it can leave us open to visualize an unrealistic outcome, minimize the obstacles and create an ineffective plan.
I think incorporating WOOP into your life can be very helpful. One of the interesting discoveries made by Dr. Oettigen is that people who have a wish, but do NOT think seriously about the outcome, the obstacles, or make a plan, tend to become unhappy and depressed. That makes sense to me and describes a lot of people I know. They have a wish, but they are unrealistic about the outcome, have minimized the obstacles and have not made a realistic plan.
I hope you will be able to join us for our conversation this Wednesday evening as we discuss WOOP and how to WOOP your life.
