Self Care

Over the last several years there has been a lot of talk about our need to take care of ourselves. Caring for ourselves is important, and I think the conversation is good because, as adults, it is up to us to care for ourselves. After all, nobody else is going to do it. 

However, I think self-care is often misunderstood. I hear people talk about self-care as a day off to do nothing, relax, watch television, or engage in other amusements that distract us from the difficult realities of life. I do think that sometimes taking a day off, doing nothing, and engaging in amusements is part of self-care. But when I think about caring for my soul it is often more like going to the dentist. It is good for me and will improve my health, but it is seldom enjoyable. Here are a couple of habits which I have incorporated into my life to maintain my soul.

Aggressive Exercise

For years research has suggested that exercise leads to better mental health, emotional well-being, and lower rates of mental illness.

Since we began traveling across the country almost six months ago, Debbie and I have gone to the gym and worked out three or four times a week. I don’t enjoy working out! I don’t like breathing hard during the cardio part of our routine and I like lifting heavy weights even less. 

Working out is inconvenient,and I can always think of other things that need to be done that I would enjoy doing more. However, after a good workout, I feel a sense of self-control and accomplishment.  Although I don’t enjoy the workout or the effort it takes to go to the gym, there is no denying the mental benefits of aggressive exercise. 

Intentional Moral Improvement

It is not hard for me to admit that I am a mess and that sin is always present in my life. What is hard is admitting to specific ways I miss people and do not love them well. It is unsettling to reflect on my conversations and realize how often I make the conversations about myself. I have worked for years trying to ask better questions and listen carefully to others when they share their stories, and I am disappointed with myself when I see how poor I am at listening to others. However, part of my self-care is not pretending I am better than I am, but confessing my sins and feeling God’s grace and forgiveness. 

I am also expanding my moral self by reading and listening to books. I listen to and read a mix of non-fiction and fiction. I read broadly, and my reading lists include histories, biographies, and memoirs. A couple of these books have not only led to good conversations, but have altered the decisions I have made and given me new ways to view my circumstances.  

Moral improvement is disruptive and takes a certain amount of courage to admit specific ways I want to change how I am living. But it is good for my soul to know that I am attending to things in my soul that are beneath the surface. 

Establishing a Routine

As we travel there are never two days that are the same. We are in different cities, traveling on different roads, and eating various foods. However, we have maintained some important routines. Every day we get up at 6 a.m. and begin our day with coffee, conversation about our planned events or travel, and we read a devotional that focuses our attention on God’s promises for us. And every night, before we go to sleep, we enjoy a small glass of red wine and thank God for another good day on planet Earth. We have had a few days that have been long and hard, but we find that at the end of every day, even the hard ones, there are many things for which we are grateful. These small routines help to keep me focused and always give me something to look forward to. 

Do What Works For you

This is what I have been doing to take care of myself, your self-care will probably look different. However, taking care of your soul will always be more than just a day off watching netflix. Taking care of our souls will always involve some disciplines which are not always pleasant. It will always involve intentionality and an act of the will. 

Taking care of ourselves is important. I pray that today, this week, and in your future you will do the work to be intentional about caring for yourself.