To survive in any kind of primitive environment, where resources are scarce and dangers are ever present, it is best to have all your
senses on high alert. At any moment you could be under attack from a wild beast or an unfriendly tribe. Under these conditions it is also best to collect and save as many resources as possible for the future. When living in uncertain circumstances, it is best to take every opportunity to grab all you can. It also seems natural, when things are risky, to always be thinking about how you can improve your situation.
These strategies, while working well in dangerous and primitive situations, are not a prescription for happiness in our normally, well-functioning world. Having all your senses on high alert leads to anxiety. Taking every opportunity to grab for more leads to an unsatisfying life of materialism and greed. And when you are always thinking about improving your situation, you can’t take time to enjoy the situation you have.
WE ARE NOT WIRED FOR HAPPINESS
I am convinced that my brain is wired for survival and NOT for happiness. If I am really going to find the happiness that my soul desires, it is going to require that I do the work of evaluating probable dangers, NOT every possible danger. It is going to require that I stop collecting resources when I have enough, so that I don’t collect resources which become a burden. And it will require that I enjoy the life I have instead of always imagining a life that I don’t have.
Last week I was teaching a group of young Airmen about happiness and suggested they begin a gratitude journal to keep track of everything that goes right. Several Airmen accepted the challenge, but one Airmen shook his head and communicated nonverbally that he thought the idea was ridiculous. With a smile, and what I hope came across as non-judgmental curiosity, I asked him what he was thinking. He said, “I think it is a good idea. And I think it would make me happier. I am just too lazy to do it.”
This Airmen highlighted a profound truth about finding happiness: it takes effort, because our brains are wired for survival, not happiness. Happiness comes only when we do the work of rewiring our brains.
REWIRING OUR BRAINS
One of the most effective ways to rewire our brains for happiness is to celebrate accomplishment. Most of us
accomplish a great deal every day, but we quickly move on to the next thing without taking time to celebrate. This week at our happiness conversation I asked our Airmen to list what they had accomplished that day, last week, and last year. When they started to list things they had accomplished, many said, “ Not much.” However, after a few minutes of writing, I had them share what they had accomplished. Once they started telling others what they had done, the conversation got progressively louder and more animated as they realized they had actually accomplished a great deal.
At the end of the conversation, we had a cake with “Congratulations” written on it. And we congratulated each other on our small and large accomplishments.
I hope that this week you’ll take some time to list, share, and celebrate your accomplishments. It probably won’t increase your chance of survival, but it will increase your happiness.
