“Compare yourself to who you were yesterday, not to who someone else is today.” Jordan Peterson
Peterson’s 12 Rules for Life: An Antidote to Chaos was a book that was very helpful to me in
thinking through who I am and how I want to live. As much as I agree with his twelve rules and want them to be part of my life, I forget easily, and my brain can quickly engage in some “stinkin’thinkin’.”
This morning I needed a refresher in Rule Four, “Compare yourself to who you were yesterday, not to who someone else is today.” I have known, and taught for years, that comparing our lives to others was a bad idea. As Peterson points out, if you lived in a small, rural community and your frame of reference were others in your community, you could be a star athlete, a spelling bee wiz, or a genius at solving math problems. You could be good at something and feel pretty good about yourself.
THE CONSEQUENCES OF COMPARING YOUR LIFE TO OTHERS
However, if your frame of reference is a large city, or even worse, everyone on the Internet, and if you compare yourself to others using those frames, you quickly discover millions of people who are better looking, richer, more successful, and more talented. Comparing ourselves to others leads to sadness and, in many cases, depression. The solution to these negative feelings is to realize that you are a unique person created in the image of God; no one is exactly like you with your gifts and talents. In addition to being a unique creation, we all are given different histories and opportunities. So rather than comparing ourselves to others, we should be thankful for the gifts and talents we have been given and ask ourselves if we are working to be the best version of ourselves. If so, the next question to ask ourselves is if we are moving in the direction we want to be moving. In light of the opportunities that we have had, we can ask if we are happy with the choices we have been making. If not, it is time to make better choices, ones that are more in keeping with who we want to be.
This rule makes perfect sense to me and, as I said, I have taught it to others long before Jordan Peterson published the 12 Rules for Life. However, the other morning I was looking at Facebook and saw the picture of a colleague whom I have known for over forty years. Judging from his post he is better looking than I am, and I was quickly reminded that he is more talented and has accomplished far more than I have. He is a great guy; not arrogant, and he would never think that he is better than I am in any way. He is a humble servant of God. And yet my brain immediately, without my permission, began to compare my life, my accomplishments, and my appearance to his, and I found myself wanting. The feeling that I am less and not good enough lasted for most of the morning. By the afternoon I was able to regain my senses, remember Rule Four, and get my mind right.
CHURCH CAN HELP
Recently, a godly Christian, who lives the Christian life as well as anyone I know, asked, “Why do I need to go to church?” I think it is a good question. And for those of us who have gone to church for years and been hurt by the church, the answer isn’t obvious.
While I think there are a number of reasons to attend church regularly, one very important reason is to be reminded. To be reminded that you are created in the image of God, and He has a plan for your life. To be reminded that there is more to life than what is visible, and that the invisible is more important than the visible. To be reminded that you are a unique creation, there is no one exactly like you, and that comparing yourself to others is not helpful to you or God’s purposes.
This is not the only reason to attend church, but it is a good reason. It is easy for all of us to forget who we are, and who we want to be. It is easy to live on a kind of auto pilot where our brains can slide into “stinkin’ thinkin’.” I pray today that you are all part of a church body that meets regularly. I pray that you are reminding yourself of the rules you want to live by. I pray that you would be free from the “stinkin’ thinkin’” that leads to bad places.
