Transitions

Transitions are difficult. When moving from one state or situation to another, you experience the loss of what was, but you are not yet experiencing the comfort of what is to come. Many transitions occur whether you desire them or not.  For example, growing older and transitioning from one stage of life to another is going to happen. Children transition to adolescence at the onset of puberty. After adolescence people transition from being young adults, to middle age, to elderly. These transitions are not as easily defined as the transition from childhood to adolescence, but they are just as real and bring elements of loss, sometimes excitement, and always some emotional discomfort.

TRANSITIONS ARE INEVITABLE

There are also cultural transitions that we all experience whether we desire them or not. For example, our culture has transitioned from an analog world to a digital world in the last thirty years. Computers, cell phones, video games, and artificial intelligence are now a reality. For those of us who remember the analog world, there are things we might miss. If you are old enough, you can remember the advantages of having phones connected to the wall instead of in our pocket or purse. 

Then there are transitions that we chose. We can choose to move to a new city, buy a new home, or take a new job. We chose to get married or divorced. These transitions also bring about emotional discomfort because, even when the change was chosen, there are elements of loss and often only the possibility of what might be. 

Sometimes, especially when the change was not chosen, there can be a desire to go back to the way it was. Older people can go back in their imaginations as they remember the “good old days.” Of course, on closer examination the “good old days” were not that good. However, the reality is there is no going back, only moving forward.

TRANSITIONS ARE OFTEN DISCOURAGING

The longer we are in transition the more easily we can become discouraged. If transitions drag on for too long, we begin to feel the loss more than we can imagine the possibilities. But transitions take time and often there is nothing we can do but wait for the new to come. 

In the last eight months I have experienced a lot of transition. I have transitioned from a place of health to a place of sickness. Although I am still healthy my wife has been battling cancer, and her illness has had a significant impact on both our lives. As she has undergone surgery, chemotherapy, and now radiation therapy, we have experienced the loss of health as a couple and are not yet sure what our new reality will be as we hope she regains some of her strength.  We are in transition.

My job is changing. We are still part of Cadence International and will continue to minister to the military community, but we will no longer be able to do an open home ministry. It is unclear exactly what my new role will be, but it will be more teaching and mentoring than having Airmen or Soldiers in our home. We are in transition. I mourn the loss of not being able to do the ministry that we have loved for so many years, and I am excited about the new possibilities of teaching.

I have also moved to a new city. We have moved from Cheyenne, Wyoming to Aurora, Colorado. This was a change that I chose, but it has been difficult. We had great friends and neighbors in Cheyenne, we had good supportive chaplains at FE Warren, and we enjoyed our work with the Airmen. We loved our home and our neighborhood. Leaving has been very difficult. We hope to develop a ministry at Buckley Space Force Base (formerly Buckey Air Force base), develop good friends in our new neighborhood and get settled into our new home, but most of these things are only exciting possibilities, not reality.

TRANSITIONS REQUIRE FAITH

Although the transition from being healthy to sick is new, I am familiar with the transition of moving. This is our 29th move. Right now, I am feeling the loss more than the excitement for the future. However, I know, deep down I really know, I just need to wait. We will get settled; we will develop a new ministry and friends, Debbie’s health will improve, and our next season of life will be filled with wonderful adventures. Right now, my task is to deal properly with feelings of loss. To deal properly with these emotions I must not deny the feelings, but I must take time and be intentional about expressing my gratitude for all the things that are going well, and pray with faith knowing God has a good plan for my life and that  my future is bright. The negative feelings are real, but they are not the deepest parts of who I am or what I believe.

I pray that if you are in transition, or anticipating a transition, you would remember it is just a season and, even though it may seem to be endless, it will come to an end.